Epiphany

Not only was I sick for a week, but I was a grouch.  I was so SO mad over losing a promotion I thought was rightfully mine.  I worked all week but let me tell you, I did not do it with a grateful or happy heart.  I just did it because that's my job.  I was not a pleasant person. 

Over the course of the past week, my heart started to soften.  I tried to see the blessing in this sadness, instead of the hurt.  No having to drive in for meetings in the rain, no long meetings, no wearing outfits that made me uncomfortable.  A chance to get back to exercising since the weather will hopefully start cooling down soon, a chance to read my Bible in the morning instead of trying to beat traffic.  Maybe a baby on the way, and I won't have to find daycare.  Maybe if a baby isn't coming, a puppy  (been dying for a puppy lately, I miss my dog Roscoe so much!) and starting a garden.  I decided to be happy where I am right now, even if I don't think I should be here. 

I went to church today.  It was a very long day.  Sometimes when I'm working on kids ministry, I don't feel effective.  Today was one of those days.  But I went to lunch with my bestie Ginger afterwards and that was so nice.  Then I helped Bucket with algebra homework, and the boys are doing their laundry and I'm going to start dinner soon.  Mr. R is in Oklahoma, not sure if he will be home for Labor Day.

Animal print dress found at Goodwill a few years ago, for $6.  My Trotters shoes and a JCP cami for $10.  I've worn this exact outfit before.  Not every outfit can be new!

I should have worn battle gear and armor today.  It was like that today. 

Time for hair color again!

I don't even bother anymore. Just throw it up in a clip and I'm done with it.

Stop Blaming the Youth

I have been working in VBS all week.  It is 3 hours a night for an entire week.  It's more like 4 hours per night because there is also set up and clean up after the actual VBS.  After working a regular 8-9 hour day, to say I am completely exhausted would be an understatement. 

Peeps, if you've know me, you should know by now that I'm a born again Christian.  Jesus Christ?  My Lord and Savior.  Yep.  This by no means makes me perfect, good, or better than anyone else.  But I am serious about my faith.  Most of my social life revolves around the church I attend.  Bible study, Sunday school, and community events are usually church oriented.  So even though I am not a fan of VBS, I did it anyway.  One, because if Jesus can die on a cross for my sins, I guess I can give up one week of my lazy evenings to be salt and light.  Two, because when you work in children's ministry, VBS is part of that.

My son received a phone call this morning from our youth pastor (who, by the way, is an awesome guy and I am so glad he and my son are friends!)   Someone complained that a bunch of teenagers destroyed the nursery and left it for staff to clean up.  I was on the phone, listening while my son tried to tell the pastor what had happened (which is, basically, that the toddlers destroyed the room, and the teenagers were attempting to clean it) and all I could do was listen to my son defend myself.

Yeah, I got upset.

Dear older church people (meaning, anyone older than 40, unless you became a fuddy duddy before then):  STOP BLAMING THE YOUTH.

You complain about youth who won't attend church?  Do you ever wonder why?  Do you think it's because that even in a place that is supposed to be accepting, and loving, and ministering, all they get is more accusations?  Do you wonder why your church has an average age of 65+?  If that is the case, your church is dying.  Today's youth has SO MUCH stacked against them.  Nothing they say is ever private anymore.  Drugs are rampant, families are broken, schools are a wasteland.  So many kids go to church, just to find themselves outcasts there, too.  Why stay?  Why stay in a place where adults get on stage and preach about love and hope and then get off that stage and start pointing fingers?

My son is discouraged.  He doesn't want to go back to VBS.  He'd rather stay home and watch a movie.  I can't imagine why.

One person, one person who thought it would be a fine idea to call the pastor and complain about something he or she didn't even see, can ruin months of my trying to get my kids to volunteer.  All of my encouragement, all of my reassurements, were broken in one false accusation.

Without the youth, your church is going to die.  People either need to accept the youth who still bother to attend, or their church will die.  Now you know.

Zebra With a Pop of Pink

Another day, another dress.  This is only the second time I've worn it, this time I chose pink as my "pop of color."  I found my pink flip flops which I wore on Easter back in March, and I lost one (it was under the TV...weird!) so wasn't able to wear them again until today.

Random stick behind me?  I didn't even notice.

Ross dress, purchased this year.  Pink flip flops, also purchased this year.  Very old black necklace purchased at a flea market years ago, and my pink Coach bag which I bought used because I'm way too cheap to buy one new. 

This upcoming week, I have VBS.  it's a staple here in the south...every day after work for a week, the church opens its doors to many, many kids.  We do crafts, sing songs, have Bible lessons, learn about  missions...it is a TON OF WORK.  And as much as I like children...I don't like VBS.  I think it's too much, but then again, I am a quiet type person who enjoys one-on-one type lessons instead of these huge group events.  But when you work in children's ministry...you do VBS.   At first I was assigned to a middle school boy (which I was perfectly fine with, I have worked with this boy in the past, and I honestly find him to be a piece of cake) but now we have another child who is 5 and completely non verbal, with a propensity to be forceful (I don't want to use the word violent when it comes to a 5 year old, but I understand he's a puncher/kicker.)  Since the other three women who all work in our disability ministry are pregnant, I offered to take this boy....can't have our pregnant ladies working with a child who might hurt them, even unintentionally.

Things I didn't do today: 1) Brush my hair.  2)  Wear makeup.  3) Eat breakfast.

Oh...and these grays?  I don't like them.  This is one thing I don't like about having such dark hair.  Those grays show up FAST.  Maybe it's time to go blonde???

It Sure Picked Up Around Here

I think I had The Weekend of Weekends.  It was jam packed from the moment I clocked out Friday night!

On Saturday, my daughter graduated from high school.

Me: my Ross Easter dress, my Avenue sandals, and my Avenue cardi.  Her: roses from Publix, and cheap polyester gown (which cost $58!!!) which tore on the bottom just as we were leaving.

Kiddos.  Awh.

Congrats to the class of 2013!

The weather was terrible and then we got wings at the Winghouse on the beach.  We wanted to go for a walk on the beach but it was pouring so that idea got scratched.

On Sunday, my darling Bucket got baptized.

He is wearing swim shorts underneath the white gown.

He liked the tub pool thing.  He said it was nice and warm.

The old is gone, the new is here!

What a happy face!  So proud of my kiddo.  I'm glad he waited to get baptized until he was old enough to understand what being a Christian really means.

Oh, and I got dressed, too.

Wearing my Ross birthday dress, with my black wrap top which is starting to fall apart.

Had to wear my blue bubble necklace with it!  Love Avenue jewelry.

There's more to come...will post again soon!

O The Wonderful Cross

Are there songs that trigger tears for you?  I have many.  I find music so personal, so intense, that I take it very seriously and some songs, no matter what mood I'm in, will have my eyes fill up.  This is one of those songs:  O The Wonderful Cross.

Sunday school was crazy today!  We had at least double our usual (which is the norm for Easter) and for the first time in a while, we had a puker.  Too much chocolate.  Poor girl was horrified and crying mostly because she was embarrassed.  Poor thing.  I don't like throwing up in front of people, either!

I wore a new dress, which I bought in February from Ross.  This dress cost...I'm not kidding...$9.99.   I hated it on the rack, tried it on, loved it.  Figured it would be cute for Easter.  I'm not sure it's bright enough:

I started off wearing my white Target cardigan which I bought probably two or three years ago.  It didn't last long; I was sweating so bad it came off quickly!

Hair in a ponytail.  Ho hum.

I got these cute pink flip flops at Target yesterday.  I hadn't intended to buy them, but the ones I was wearing broke and I couldn't walk around barefoot.  (as much as I'd like to)

Oh.  And it's windy, too!

No outfit documentation is complete without me making a stupid face.

I'll be wearing this dress ALL THE TIME.  It is so comfy and colorful!

This place is packed today!

He is risen!

Gorgeous banners.

Happy Easter to you, my readers!  I hope your day is immeasurably blessed!

They Let Me In

Today was a fun day at church.  I went to work in children's ministry, then went to church.  Tiger is still home recuperating from his surgery, and Missy has a nasty sinus infection.  I brought Bucket to the convenience store after church to get him a soda since he was especially well behaved in church today, brought him home, then ran back to church to the leadership meeting.

I go to a very welcoming, open-armed type church.  But see, I don't see myself as a leader.  I work in ministry as a kid's helper, which many people see as leadership.  So when our actual leader of our kids ministry wasn't able to attend the meeting today, I had to go in his place.  Eeeeeep!  Uh, ok.  I crept in, trying to be discreet, but the pastor called me out and said, "Sarah's here! Hi Sarah, don't be shy, join us!"  (do they know me or what, they know I'm shy.)  Then he introduced me to everyone in the room, "This is Sarah, she's the wife of one my fishing buddies, so be nice to her!"  I had to smile...that was a great intro and soon I was diving into the delicious lunch (bbq chicken sandwiches, salad, mac and cheese, baked beans and I skipped the cake but it sure looked delicious!)  I sat with my friend Emily (she also teaches in kids ministry) and we planned out most of the activities for 2013.  I know I say this over and over, but I love, love, love my church!

Missy came outside to take my pictures even though she was sick.  I seem to have fallen into a bit of a rut with my clothes again; wear a dress, throw a top over it, wear earrings and brush your hair.  It's not bad, it's not wrong, I'm just bleah kind of bored with it.  But I look  nice enough that I receive compliments almost everywhere I go, and I appreciate it.  Wanna see?

Black and white Target maxi dress.  Just thrifted this Basic Edition top at Goodwill yesterday for $4.  It's a size 1x, I love the little button detailing around the neck.  I like this style of shirt so much that I'd buy this top in every color it was made in.  Things I like about this shirt: 1) the length 2) the v-neck 3) the sleeve length 4) the detail around the neck. 

Perfectly covered for church services.

I had on a blue dress this morning and changed my mind, so I'm wearing blue eye make up.  Then I didn't change my make up...oh well, no one said anything.

Oh yes, wearing my old black Target flats as well, and my red In Pink earrings.

This would probably be my favorite photo if not for the awful bunchy neck issue.  Oh well...I still had a great day!

Now I'm going to watch a bit of TV and I plan to put all the dvds back in their proper cases today and clean up my desk for regular week of work.  Well, almost regular.  I have half a day on Thursday...I finally managed to get...shhhh...a JOB INTERVIEW!!!  At my own hospital, for coding!  It only took two years....my my my.

Weary

It appears my sorrow has no end.  My miscarriage is still raw and fresh in my mind.  Last night, a dear friend passed away suddenly and unexpectedly.  He was a good, godly man who I respected, an elder in my church, who was also a husband, father and teacher.  As I cried thinking of his wife, his three children, his students, Tiger came to me to tell me that he wasn't feeling well.   The wound from his surgery has reopened; he is running a fever and I brought him back to the doctor, who tells me it is infected and we probably need surgery again.

I am overcome with grief, with sorrow, with pain.  Being a Christian doesn't protect me from hurting.  In fact, Psalm 119:28 says, "My soul is weary with sorrow; strengthen me according to your word."  Lord, I have never felt so tired in my life.  I feel like my heart is breaking every second of the day; every time I turn around, I am faced with more bad news.  A friend's mom diagnosed with breast cancer; a person losing their home; a friend of Missy's dying in his sleep, at only 19 years  old!  Epilepsy, autism, SO MUCH PAIN, and I wonder how many hits I can take.  My favorite part of the day is when I go to bed, and when I wake, I fear who is going to tell me the next bad thing.   I wonder if I could ever run out of tears, and then I think of my friend's wife who suddenly has no husband to be by her side, and I sob all over again. 

When Bucket was little and we were going through the trials of autism, people would tell me how strong I was.  And I was smug about it.  I was like, "I sure am."  And in my own head, I suppose I thought I was better than all those people who "couldn't handle a kid like that."  But the truth is, I am not strong at all.  I am so very, very weak.  I am supposed to find my strength in Him, and I do.  But honestly, I want to do things myself.  Sometimes that independent streak causes me quite a bit of strife.  But Lord, I am listening to you now, and I am trying so very hard to be dependent on You, not me.  Thank goodness you are a Daddy who lets me try again and again, because You love me so.  I keep going back to that word.  Daddy.  Just like I wanted my Daddy when Fergus left me, I still feel like a little girl who wants to curl up in the lap of her father to be comforted.  Human daddies failed me, but He never has.  He never, ever has.

Day 6 of June Dresses; Sad and Humid

One of my favorite dresses, my weird animal print which resembles no animal I am aware of; I bought it at Goodwill for $6 last year.  I love it.  But I am sad and crampy today; I guess a February baby is not on my horizon.  When Mr. R and I did the reversal, we knew there was only about a 40% chance of us getting pregnant; between my age, and the age of the vasectomy, it was a lot like throwing money into the wind.  But I knew that walking into it, but I can't help but be a bit sad when I feel those familiar cramps start in my back, and work their way toward my abdomen.  Between the rain and my pain, I just want to lie down and take a nap.  Alas, my workload is high due to me taking that half day off yesterday, and I have an autism meeting tonight.  No rest for Sarah.

Missy's cat Nutmeg is about to drive me insane.  She will NOT leave me alone.  She follows me all over the house even worse than Roscoe ever did.  She cries when I go to the bathroom and shut the door.  And I have to shut the door, because she will try to sit on your lap when you potty and that's just too weird for me.  She jumps on top of me while I'm typing, tries to lay on my keyboard, and has disconnected the wires to my phone several times.  Plus, she's a photobomber.

Anyway, please pardon the quality of these photos.  This is actually a Florida thunderstorm; even though it is raining outside, the sun shines right through it and makes this awful glare.  I need to find a better spot in my house to take photos.  This is my dirty front door which needs to be washed, then painted.  I hate white doors.  I don't like white walls, either.

The dress has a sweet little V in the back which I like very much.  I am wearing a tank underneath because the front dips a bit low also.  Oh, and wearing my leopard print flip flops with my animal print dress.  No jewelry today because I'm just working and don't really bother during the week when no one sees me.  I figure it saves my stuff from overuse and I get to keep it longer?

After it rained, I asked Bucket to take a few outdoor pics to see if the glare would go aware.

I don't know what is up with Bucket and these sideways shots.  I  look like I'm about to fall.

Classic movie star pose: coy shoulder look back.  Bucket says I'm not pulling it off.

Only in Florida:  you can see the humidity I'm standing in.  This is why I cut my hair, peeps.  There is no point in this swamp.  None.

Lately, I feel bad about my posts.  My attempt was to showcase dresses in my wardrobe, because I think the way a person dresses says a lot about themselves.  However, it is making me feel vain.  I'm really, truly, not completely vain.  I mean, I do want to look nice, and I stress out when I get pimples and my clothes make me uncomfortable.  I go to the store without makeup a lot, I go out running in stuff that doesn't match, and I promise you my life doesn't revolve around my clothing.  So here are two other things I'm working on right now:

150 Days of Psalms:  That's right!  Mr. R and I are doing a 150 day study.  One psalm per day.  We figured this was something we could do together, even when he's on the road, since psalms tend to be short.  We both read Psalm 1 yesterday and then during one of our evening phone calls, we discussed it.

Psalm 1

New King James Version (NKJV)

1 Blessed is the man
Who walks not in the counsel of the ungodly,
    Nor stands in the path of sinners,
    Nor sits in the seat of the scornful;
² But his delight is in the law of the Lord,
    And in His law he meditates day and night.
³ He shall be like a tree
    Planted by the rivers of water,
    That brings forth its fruit in its season,
    Whose leaf also shall not wither;
And whatever he does shall prosper.

⁴ The ungodly are not so,
But are like the chaff which the wind drives away.
⁵ Therefore the ungodly shall not stand in the judgment,
Nor sinners in the congregation of the righteous.

⁶ For the Lord knows the way of the righteous,
But the way of the ungodly shall perish.

We both get this one; I think it's pretty obvious.  But I said, "What in the world is chaff?"  Mr. R said that chaff is leftover wheat once it's been processed.  I said, "So chaff is garbage?"  He said, it considered a nuisance and is usually burned.  WHOA.  I went on merriam-webster.com and it said there that chaff is "something comparatively worthless."  I'll be reading Psalm 2 later today and when I call Mr. R tonight, we'll talk about that one, too.  Do any of you do Bible readings with your husband?  Or is it something that you do on your own, or with another Bible study group?

Second thing going on:  Have been considering going back to college, at Herzing again of course!   I know one might be thinking, but Sarah!  You were hoping to have a baby.  And I AM still hoping to have a baby.  Maybe more than one.  But let's just say that certain things I don't tend to discuss on this blog; namely the health of my husband; may require my eventual return to the workplace.  Don't worry, he's not dying, no cancer, but living as a truck driver is ruining his health.  Between his back, his upper respiratory issues, it is almost time for him to get out of that truck.  If I go back to school now, I can have my master's degree by 2016, which is when Bucket graduates high school.  Mr. R is suggesting that perhaps he can have a few trucks by then, put drivers in them, and just collect a percentage.  He wants to retire from trucking; grow a garden, have some chickens, go hunting and fishing.  We haven't made a final decision; we are both concerned about adding to our debt load.  So please be praying for us; between our finances, and his health, we covet your prayers.

I Need Palazzo Pants

Ok, that's it.  I love my skirts and dresses; Monday - Saturday, you will be hard pressed to see me in anything else, except maybe my workout clothes.  But after today, I think I will be retiring my skirts and dresses for Sundays.  I spent most of today dealing with two very sweet little boys who both thought the most awesome place to hang out was under my skirt.  Both of whom have no social boundaries (hence the autism diagnosis) and while I was very firm with both of them about "Under Miss Sarah's skirt is private and no one is allowed down there" both of them kept diving in.  After an hour, I was getting pretty annoyed and had it been one of my own kids, a swat on the bottom would have been warranted. (Clearly, I'm not laying my hands on kids at church)  There is also now a rip where I had tucked it under my feet while sitting on the floor, and it tore when one of them tried to grab it to hide underneath.  Not cool.  I hope I can fix it.  So I will be shopping for some palazzo pants; still roomy enough for me to be comfy and sit on the floor with the kids, and plus, I'll get to wear some of my many tops just collecting dust in my closet.  So probably not next Sunday, but maybe the Sunday after, I will have some new item of clothing to debut.

So what was all the fuss about?

My mermaid skirt now has a rip in it.

No idea why any kid would want to hide under here!

So, as you can see by my hair, I am sick of it, plus my grays are coming back in with a vengeance.  I despise having gray hair.  Funny, I think it looks hot on Mr. R, but I DO NOT like it on me one bit.

Miraculous new invention called LEAVE IN CONDITIONER! Manageable hair, but I need a trim or something because it looks awful!

I really don't like wearing white shirts.  I think they wash me out, so I made sure to wear the blue green necklace near my face, plus green earrings. 

Church was great today, except for the nosy little boys!  (I do love those boys...but they just have limits!) We are going to be doing a VBS in July and I'm both looking forward to it, and dreading it.  I love kids, I really do.  But I could not be a teacher.  I get annoyed very quickly when unruly children do not follow directions and rules, and that includes my own kids.  Sometimes I'm still not sure how I ended up in children's ministry!  But in every church I've ever been to, that's where I end up.  VBS this year sounds like a ton of work, and of course, I will be one of the autism supporters.  They wanted me to run an actual Bible room, which is something I'd love to do, but I we are already short on autism volunteers, so I need to stay put.

I'm not used to my hair laying so flat.  That leave in conditioner sure is something!

The best picture out of the bunch, I think.  Coldwater Creek shirt, size 1x, eBay.  Avenue skirt, 2011, $20?  Necklace from my friend Natalie, and Avenue shoes.

I LIKE BIG BUTTS AND I CANNOT LIE YOU OTHER BROTHERS CAN'T DENY...

"Bucket, give me a hug!"  "Arrrrgggghhhhhh!"

Turquoise pedi.  How cute!

Gratitude Day 10

Today I am incredibly grateful for the power of prayer.  I received a phone call this morning from a friend regarding my two eldest children; apparently they were both boasting to a friend that they are no longer believers, and consider themselves atheists.  To say I am shocked is an understatement, as I've raised my children in the church their entire lives.  I immediately called Mr. R to tell him this, and we will be making some changes around the house, one of which includes cutting off our cable TV and requiring church attendance on Sundays, and possibly Wednesday nights (I had been slacking in this area.)  If we don't attend church on Wednesdays, I will be starting my own Bible study with the kids in the house.

Devil, you may try to take my children, but you will not win.  My house is covered in the blood of Jesus and my children belong to Him.  I intend to be on my knees over this situation because my kids and their souls are absolutely precious to me.  The world will not win them.

Gratitude Journal

So I've seen many facebookers declare the month of November "Gratitude Month" and for every day, they're going to say something that they are grateful for.  I think this is a wonderful idea, but I'm going to do it here on my blog instead of on fb. 

For my very 1st post, I want to say that I'm grateful for the cross.  To think that Jesus would die for ME...and he would have done it for just me, and not all of humanity....humbles me completely and warms the very depth of my soul.  I am so blessed that Jesus is not some guy in a storybook, or a myth, but a living Savior who cares about my every issue.  Even during my despair after my father's death, I knew He was there for me.  Jesus, I love YOU so much!

Mother

I stood at the sink washing dishes last night, tears streaming down my face.  My oldest son, Tiger, who is now about four inches taller than me, came up behind me and hugged me.  "I love you, Mom."  I stood there, hands in soapy water, sobbing, as my little boy who is bigger than me held me.  "I wish I could say something to make you feel better, but I don't know what this feels like," he admitted.
I turned to him and said, "Son, I want you to know that in order for me to feel like a success as a mother, I need to have taught you only two things.  Do you want to know what those two things are?"  He nodded.

"I want you to know that Jesus loves you, that He is your Savior.  Two, I want you to know that I love you, and that nothing you do can ever separate my love from you."  He looked surprised and said "I know both of those things, Mom!"

I said to him, "I didn't have the last one, hon.  I knew my dad never loved me.  I knew, even as a little girl, that he chose another family over me.  I laid in bed at night wondering if maybe if I had better grades, or was prettier, or maybe if I did my chores better, maybe my Daddy would come back.  I wondered why my mom went hungry some nights so I could eat.  I thought daddies took care of their little girls.  I wondered why I never had new clothes, or why I had to wear shoes that sometimes hurt my feet because they were too small.  I wondered why I couldn't afford to do after school sports, or have birthday parties, or go on vacations.  I wondered why our church paid for Christmas, and not my father.  Son, for a child to know that her father doesn't love her, does SO MUCH DAMAGE to her soul, to her psyche, and touches every relationship afterwards.  So yes, I am partially crying because now this relationship will never be mended, but I'm also crying because I know your father and I broke the cycle, and that you will never know what it feels like to not know a father's love.  And that, my sweet son, is worth crying for."

I Just Can't Keep Up

I get the distinct feeling that unless I hire a chef, a maid, or a clone, that it's going to be this way for quite a while.  I feel like I'm drowning in STUFF TO DO, and I don't like it...not one bit!  Even this weekend, there is literally not one part of it that is not planned out.  Of course, it's filled with things I like, so hard to complain there.  On Saturday afternoon, my mom and stepdad are throwing an anniversary party for themselves.  I can't believe they've been married 25 years already!  I'll definitely be taking some pictures of that.  On Sunday, we have church, and then I'm supposed to stay afterwards for a student leaders meeting.  Which I suppose would be nice except I haven't been faithfully attending Wednesday night services like I said I would.  Last Wednesday afternoon, when I reminded the kids that we had church, the sad response of tired kids made the decision for me.  We stayed home.  I think Missy went to bed at 7pm.  Tiger may have followed suit a half hour later.  I played chess with Bucket and just talked.  It was nice.

For the first time in six weeks, Mr. R finally got paid today (thank you, thank you, THANK YOU LORD) so I am going to go grocery shopping and catch up on this enormous stack of bills sitting on my desk.  I also have a filthy desk to clean, my bathroom needs a good scrubbing, and I really want to bake some pumpkin bread and muffins for the kids to use as snacks next week. 

To my own dismay, I find myself not spending any time in The Word except on Sundays.  I feel like a am a complete hypocrite.  Been done with college for 6 months now and have not gotten any better about my Bible reading, although I did add exercise to my daily schedule, and have been mostly faithful with that for about two months.  I feel like I have scheduled myself into oblivion and know I need to add this as well. 

Work has stressed me out completely.  I applied for another job at the hospital, even though I said I wouldn't.  And so far, I've head nothing, which could be a good thing.  The post is now closed, which means that there are can be no further applicants.  When I click on the post, it says that my application is under consideration, which is the furthest I've gotten so far in this application process here at the hospital.  I am thinking about going out this weekend and purchasing a suit in case I get an interview next week.  All I own are dresses, which are really great, but not interview-ish or businessy.  They're pretty.  Pretty does not equal interview, in my eyes.  And I will get a pant suit to hide my leg tattoo.  Gotta play the game, I guess.

I just re-read this (which, by the way, has taken me about an hour to type out because I'm working and I'm doing this while on hold and listening to bad music) and it sounds whiny, which I swear isn't like me at all.  I like being known for my cheerful, quirky, and upbeat attitude.  But when something which takes 40 hours of your week is a drain, it drains more than that 40 hours.  It drains YOUR LIFE. 

Trying to keep my mind off my troubles, I've decided to decorate the front porch/door area for Halloween.  I usually don't, but I've decided to give out candy this year.  With my youngest being 13, even if they decide to go trick or treating, don't really need me to go with them.  They can stay within a four block radius and go by themselves.  I've found that doing something creative keeps my brain happy and not thinking about insurance.  But I won't be doing scary Halloween stuff, like witches or spiders.  I'm going to keep it harvest and autumn related instead so I can keep it all up until Thanksgiving.  Maybe I'll even take some before and after shots.  Yeah, a project.  That's what I need.  A project!

The New Testament in 40 Days

I saw this on a blog, http://shelookethwell.blogspot.com/ , and decided to join.  After all, I had been lax in reading my Bible lately for a long time.  So I was delighted to join.
I'm on Day 2, and loved reading the Sermon on the Mount again.  How wise He is!  Would you like to join me?  Here's the schedule:

Here is the schedule, all you need to do is print it up!

The New Testament In 40 Days

Day 1: Matthew 1-7
Day 2: Matthew 8-12
Day 3: Matthew 13-18
Day 4: Matthew 19-24
Day 5: Matthew 25-28
Day 6: Mark 1-6
Day 7: Mark 7-11
Day 8: Mark 12-16
Day 9: Luke 1-4
Day 10: Luke 5-9
Day 11: Luke 10-13
Day 12: Luke 14-19
Day 13: Luke 20-24
Day 14: John 1 -5
Day 15: John 6-9
Day 16: John 10-14
Day 17: John 15-19
Day 18: John 20-Acts 4
Day 19: Acts 5-9
Day 20: Acts 10-15
Day 21: Acts 16-20
Day 22: Acts 21-26
Day 23: Acts 27-Romans 4
Day 24: Romans 5-10
Day 25: Romans 11-1 Corinthians 1
Day 26: 1 Corinthians 2-9
Day 27: 1Corinthians 10-15
Day 28: 2 Corinthians 16-2 Corinthians 9
Day 29: 2 Corinthians 10-Galatians 4
Day 30: Galatians 5-Philippians 1
Day 31: Philippians 2- 1Thessalonians 2
Day 32: 1 Thessalonians 3-1 Timothy 5
Day 33: 1 Timothy 6-Hebrews 1
Day 34: Hebrews 2-10
Day 35: Hebrews 11 -James 5
Day 36: 1 Peter-1 John 1
Day 37: 1 John 2-Jude
Day 38: Revelation 1-7
Day 39: Revelation 8-15
Day 40: Revelation 16-22

This Liar Went to Church

I love my church so much!  They truly are a family to me.  Many times I will call a church member if I have a problem, before I call someone in my own family.  It is such a blessing to be a member of the Body of Christ!  I love Jesus, and I love His Word; but you know what, I'm still a sinner in need of grace.  I lied to you guys.  I did.  Because guess what:  I bought a new dress, right after I said I wasn't going to buy any more clothes!  But it was red and on sale; and it's so comfy and I love it!  I'm so glad God forgives me when I lie and sin and do stupid things!  Wanna see my new dress?

Red, cute, and....maternity.  Can you tell?  I swear I couldn't.  I tried it on and loved it, and then noticed when I looked at the tag.  I almost put it back...and then thought, you know, can you really tell it's maternity?  It is lightweight, comfy, a beautiful rich color, and I love the neckline.  I didn't have to wear a tank with it!

I wore my fabulous red wedges with my fabulous Target clearance rack maternity dress. 

Ummm...I also bought the cardigan.  But seriously, it was on clearance too, and it's such a great buy!  I will use it for a long time, as long as I don't spill anything on it.

Sarah!  DUST YOUR CHINA CABINET FOR PETE'S SAKE!

I also took pictures of Missy and Tiger.  Bucket was not having it.  Which is really a shame because he looked cute this morning. 

His shirt says "I would lift weights if they weren't so heavy."  Ah, sarcasm.  He is fluent.

Someone is learning to pose like her mama.

I may have to steal this top from her, now that I think about it.

And last but not least:

Where is my dinner, human?!?!

I see you putting dirty dishes in this box thingy here, lady, but I am wondering where the vittles are.

If you don't feed me, I'm gonna poop in your shoe.  Oh, wait, I did that already.  Can I eat anyway?