Sunday, May 31, 2015

My Phone Makes Me Angry

Like most people (except professional bloggers, maybe) I use my cell phone to take pictures.  I had probably 15 pictures of my outfit for church last week and my phone ate all of them but two!  Ugh...I'll be switching back to my digital camera from now on.  I am so bummed, because I looked super cute.  I didn't bother this week, as I'm on day two of my period and I dressed for comfort and threw my hair back into a ponytail.

Was trying to do a profile shot.  I like this picture quite a bit, and made it my profile picture on Facebook, where of course my mother complained that I don't look very happy.  Unfortunately, when I do smile, my cheeks are so big that it messes up profile shots.  Everyone's a critic, eh?  I also feel like I'm at an age where I really do need a bit of lipstick.  I don't wear lipstick usually, but I look kind of pale and sickly here, and I'm finally not!

And HALF a picture, as my phone decided to only eat half of this shot.  It's a cute, comfy, summer dress, purchased from Walmart in Deltona, FL for under $15.  It's a size 16 and it did me well all day.  I'm wearing my Bare Traps sandals, which I totally love and pray that they last me the rest of the summer.

I don't talk much about my weight loss journey, mostly because it's a pretty slow and boring journey.  If you're not into weight loss, then that's cool with me.  I am not into fat shaming or skinny shaming.  People have different bodies.  I'm shorter and heavier than most, and it's really okay.  But I don't like having diabetes, and I would very much like to keep all the toes on my feet, and so weight loss is important to me right now.  When I lost my little baby in December 2013, I was almost 280 lbs, and I am about 5 foot 5.  So quite overweight/obese.  I was shocked when I was weighed (I had to be, for anesthesia, because my left fallopian tube burst, if you are a newish reader) and once I healed from my surgery, I started doing small things to change my life.  I do low carb, but I'm not crazy insane about it (I had bread today, probably for the first time in a month.)  I am not on any insulin or metformin, just cactus pills, essential oils, diet and exercise.  In the last 8 months, my life has gone haywire.  I got pregnant again and lost it again, lost my job, lost my grandpa...and lost some weight.  As of this morning, I weigh 236.  I am really proud of how far I've come, and a little annoyed and how much further I have to go.  Right now, my goal is just to hit 199 and reevaluate after that.

I go for walks, but I still don't run because I'm so heavy that I'm scared that I'm going to break an ankle or knee.  I low carb, but if it's someone's birthday, I am going to have ice cream.  I avoid fast food, I make most of my own lunches, and I drink tons of water.  I really feel good and I'm enjoying the changes I see in my body.  About two years ago, I was wearing an 18/20 or a size 2x, sometimes 3x.  Today, I am in a 14/16, and a 1x.  Except for pants which I still wear a size 20 but those are getting pretty baggy on me.  But yet, I can't get into size 18 over my butt.  Oh well, this is why I don't really like pants all that much!

So besides weight loss, what else is there to talk about?  My job? Sure.  I'm still there, it's coming up on 4 months.  Do I still like it as much as I did when I started?  No.  I still like the people, but I did referral coordinating for thirteen years at the hospital, and now I'm doing it again.  I was bored before, and I'm bored now.  Not only that, but they discovered I can type like a demon, and I got stuck with tons of data entry, which I find tedious.  Plus, it hurts my eyes!  But I am still grateful to be working and have health insurance, so I'm going to go to work with a smile on my face and joy in my heart.  I just didn't go to college and get into debt to do data entry.  I want to be a medical coder!  I actually started coding again part time in the evenings just to keep my knowledge up.  Plus, I'm about to order the study guide materials for ICD-10, which is a huge step in medical coding that I have not taken yet.  At first, I was going to see if my new job would pay for my materials, but I decided against it.  After getting burned so bad by the hospital, I do not want to sign a contract stating I owe them time for them buying it for me.  I wasted three years after I graduated at the hospital trying to get into the coding program and couldn't even get an interview!  But I couldn't leave because I had signed a contract.  Well, my loyalty is now to myself and my family, not the company.  So yeah, I'm going to pay for it myself and then if I can find a coding job that pays more, I have no problem leaving.  It sounds cold and crass, but it's not.  I have student loans that I have to pay, and I'm still not making enough money to pay them off.  It kinda stinks!  Let me reiterate...I like my job, I love the people, I love the company.  But I love my family and myself more.

So enough of that.

Let's say goodnight to Tequila.  I'm about to make myself some lunches for the week, take a shower and give myself a pedicure!

Good night, sweet puppy.  Mommy loves you!


ஐღReneeღஐ said...

You look so beautiful..
That blue is perfect color for you :-)

Sarah R said...

Awww, thank you! You are too kind!