I took down that ridiculous weight counter.
Look, I'm fat. I get it. I can cut myself down to 1500 cals a day, bike ride my tukkus off, drink water until my bellybutton is peeing, and not lose weight.
Sometimes, you just have to accept who you are.
I'm Sarah. I'm plus sized. I wear an 18/20. I have stretch marks, and a decent fat roll around my gut where my body held three amazing children. Maybe someday, I'll have even more children and get even more stretch marks. I have super strong legs, feet that can take me on walks (except in the heat because no matter how long I live in this swamp, I can't get used to this weather. Sorry!) I have a curvy butt, a rack of doom, a squishy tummy and flabby arms. My mom loves me, my kids love me, my husband loves me, JESUS LOVES ME, and I love me! I'll be concentrating more on eating healthily, putting more miles on that bike, walking a 5k without dying, and being the best danged Sarah I can possibly be.
Psalm 139:14 says "I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well."
I am going to remind myself of that every day when I feel I don't measure up in the world against models who are a foot taller than me, who are fifteen years younger than me, who have not had any children, who smoke cigarettes, heroin and whatever else it takes to remain thin. I'm going to have my coffee, have an awesome meal with my man, and I'm going to have dessert. I'm going to drink a margarita without wondering about the caloric content, and I'm not going to hide myself in swaths of black and brown to hide myself from the world. I like red, and I like orange, and I'm going to wear those colors even though they're probably not the "correct" colors for a plus size girl! I'm going to be beautiful despite what the world thinks about me and I'm going to have fun! I'm going to the beach this weekend, and I'm going to wear a swimsuit! I'm going to lay out in my chair, read a magazine or a book, and melt into the sand. I'm going to buy clothes that fit me, or make them myself. I'm going to wear make up and not fade into the background. I'm going to laugh loudly, smile widely, and not be ashamed just because I don't fit into the social strata.
Yeah. That's what I'm going to do. I'm wonderfully and fearfully made. I'm not a mistake, an aberration, or a mutation.
Now, excuse me. Missy made tacos for dinner and they smell FABULOUS.
9 comments:
You go Sarah!!!!
Who says color is not for the size 18 girl? I'm an 18 right now and I love color and stylish clothes. That is one of the main things that bothers me about being plus size; the clothes look like you are either 80 or wearing a tent! I'm wanting to get into a 16 misses so I can shop in the regular dept. We'll see if I ever make it.
Can I get an AMEN sista??? I agree 10000000% With all of those things.
Right ON, lady.
I heart you guys. Sniff.
Back to my margarita.
Girl. You are SO my friend! :) If we ever get to meet in real life...you buy the chips and salsa and I'll buy the Margaritas!!!! :)
Btw, the peeing out the belly button nearly madely pee MYSELF!! haha!
You are awesome and I love this post!!! And who says you have to be anything other than the size you are now? Are you healthy, is your BP ok, do you feel good? Then screw the rest of them and have a good time! :)
Well, Amanda, I'm pretty healthy, but my BP is terrible. I am on medication for it. I feel pretty awesome most days except for when it's spicy burrito week.
love this post! you are so brave. i'm plus size too, but shy. i do love nice clothes and have finally decided to sew my own as what i can afford in the stores make me look dumpy and frumpy. i'm still working on accepting that people love me regardless of my size.
Brave? Me? Oh my. I'm not so sure about that, but I thank you for the compliment.
But awesome? (per Amanda) Hehehe, yeah, I totally agree with that. Bwahahaha!
I kid, I kid. But thank you for the kind words, all. I treasure them more than you realize.
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