Tears

My school work today brought me to tears.  And not pretty, soap opera tears.  The kind of crying that gives you hiccups, a red nose, and a blinding headache. 

You see, I am a good student.  I would even say I'm smart.  I'm not a genius, but I'm not a complete doofus either.  (and if I am a doofus, please don't tell me, because it would make me cry again.)  This algebra class is literally giving me heart palpitations.  I had to walk away this afternoon because I literally could feel the vein in my neck throbbing and frankly, I don't think algebra is worth my having a stroke.  I went into my room, shut the blinds, hid under the covers and had a nice little fantasy about being on a cruise with my hubby.  By the way, I'm skinny in all my dreams.  But that's another story entirely.

Right now, I have a 70% in algebra, which is the lowest C you can possibly get.  It is also the only grade I've had under a B+ the entire time I've been at Herzing.  I had just taken a pre-test and gotten a 25%.  And this was after watching hours of video lectures on dividing and multiplying radicands with variables AND fractions.  Can ANYONE please tell me why I have to know this crap before I can be a coder?  ANYONE?!?!

I am looking at the very real possibility that I will not graduate in April due to this one class.  And this class is over in about ten days.  I have one more regular test to take, then my final, and I am done.  And if I don't get at least a D....I don't know what happens.  I don't know if I can take it again in March, or if I have to wait until summer.

I know I'm getting ahead of myself, but this next week will not be a studying type week for me.  You see, I have my internship next week.  I will be driving to Orlando every day and lose lots of hours in my car.  Hours in which I am normally studying.  And because Herzing opted to use e-books, I can't even bring my book with me to study on my lunch breaks.   I am scared.  Scared I'm going to fail and not earn my degree over algebra.

Let the crying continue.