Pity party over.
No, I don't have any close friends right now, that is true. However, that just means the position is open, and I am seeking qualified candidates! LOL!!! Applicants would love God, a lot of children, schizophrenic cats, the hum of the dryer, and multiple cups of coffee. She would not be upset if I had to stay home because someone threw up. Because her kid would be throwing up too, probably. She would recognize that Bucket acts up because he can't control himself, not because he is a brat. She would call me to say hello because she cares about me, not because she wants a free babysitter. Although if she needed me to babysit, I would. Because I'd care about her too. It wouldn't be mandatory for her husband to get along with mine, but it would be cool. She would come over and not blink an eyelash because I didn't get to sweep yet. In fact, she'd probably grab the broom and help me. She wouldn't try to solve my problems, she'd just listen to me talk them through. She'd cry with me when I'm upset, and laugh with me when things are good...and I'd do the same with her.
It would really rock if we wore the same size shoes.