Wednesday, May 14, 2008

My Health

Birthdays tend to make you think about life, at least it is that way for me. And lately, my health...well, its not so good. I am severely overweight. Not just *pleasantly plump* or *cute and chubby*, but nasty, severely, OBESE. I have high blood pressure, shortness of breath, and I'm probably pre-diabetic, if not completely diabetic. I have at least one chin, my calves are so large that I can't even wear regular boots, and granny panties are my specialty, because I'm too fat to wear pretty ones. I'm certainly not happy about it, but apparently not enough to change my ways. I eat terrible foods, I am addicted to coffee, and I never exercise. Unless you count walking to the fridge as exercise. Ahem.
Tomorrow, I will be 33 years old. I really want to make a change in my life. I was watching CMT the other day, and there was a video on, and the guy was singing to his daughter, saying "I sure wish your mama was here for your wedding day." And it absolutely stopped me in my tracks...will I be around when my kids get married? Missy is 12...if she gets married at age 22, will I be there? Will I have a heart attack and die? Will I have diabetes so bad that I will lose my vision? Will I need to have fingers and toes amputated due to lack of circulation? I don't want any of that!
In my class at school, we are having to make a time management project on how to spend time wisely. Let me tell you, I know I'm a busy person. Full time job, part time school, church, children, husband, won't be easy to fit exercise in my schedule. But I'd rather fit that in, than my husband having to plan my funeral when I'm 40.
This is also not about being skinny. I doubt I will ever be skinny, and its not my intent to be supermodel sized. One of my best friends, after having 4 children, is a size 2. She had issues gaining weight with her 4th son. That is generally not my problem! Even at age 18, when I was in college, I was a size 12. But I was a svelte 12. I just have curvy hips, a big booty, and large breasts. I don't think I could pull off anything smaller than a 10/12 without looking sickly.
I will work on my time management project tonight, and figure out where I can fit 1 hr per day of exercise into my day. I'm thinking a half hour before the kids wake up, and a 1/2 hr at lunch, but I'll work on it.
And...I'm going to be honest here. You want numbers? Fine.
I'm 5 foot 4 or 5, hard to measure my own height. Literally just hopped off scale, and I am sad to report, I weigh in today at 272 pounds. I did just eat breakfast and I am wearing clothes, so maybe take a pound or two away? I weighed about 150 in college and looked amazing. So I guess that means I need to lose 120 pounds, somewhere around there.

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Julia said...

That was brutally honest. Maybe it's like an AA meeting. Step one is admitting you have a problem. Your build sounds like mine, curvy and thick even when you're not fat. I'm overweight too, and I'm turning 30 this year. I feel your pain. Have you started exercising yet? You might like this blog. She started out 100 lbs heavier than you. If you read from the beginning you will see her false starts, but then once she starts losing weight it's just so awesome to read about. Now she looks like a normal, healthy person. It's very inspiring.

Sarah R said...

No, I haven't read that, but I'm about to!
That was so hard to type. My husband doesn't even know how much I weigh. So ummm...yeah. I'm still shocked I admitted it!
As far as exercise, I did walk to church today instead of driving the four blocks!