Friday, December 26, 2014

I Was All Bah Humbug This Year

I know, I know.  I haven't posted in weeks.  My past two Christmases have been very sad, losing the babies.  This year, I was just feeling hopeless because I haven't been able to find a job with benefits.  I've had a few interviews, and nothing has panned out.  However, the temp coding place is starting to appear more permanent.  There are endless charts to code, and I'm learning quickly.  I was just given an opportunity to code as much as I want, as I keep passing my audits.  That helped boost my spirit.  I start that on Monday.  Yay!  No benefits, but I'll be making more money than I ever did at the hospital, so I'll keep at it until something else pops up.

Money has been really tight.  I didn't even have enough money for a tree.  My sister had an extra artificial tree, and let me use it.  Plant season is about to start at my husband's job in February, so we'll be doing okay for a few months.  I know we'll be all right.  I just never realized how badly I react to rejection.  It makes sense, really, since my own father rejected me at a very young age.  I have a hard time when I'm pushed away...even by a faceless employer.  If I do get hired somewhere, I really need to work on not having work being my all and everything.  I realize now that I made my job more than a job, and it wasn't healthy at all.

My husband celebrated his 42nd birthday on Christmas Eve.  Here he is on our back patio, with a glass of wine and a stogie.  

My kiddos on Christmas morning.  I couldn't really afford presents this year.  They each got a little bit of money, and their stockings filled.  That's it.  I know Christmas isn't about gifts, but it's the first year I've never been able to buy my kids presents.  It was hard for me.

Had to take my new car to the dealership today for an oil change.  Plus, the interior lights in my car didn't work.  I let my salesperson know the day after we bought the car, and was told to bring the vehicle in during my first oil change.  Well, guess what.  My salesperson doesn't work there anymore, so the dealership tried to make me pay for the damage.  Luckily for me, I had saved the text messages from the salesperson stating that it would be covered.  I won!  While we were waiting for the car to be diagnosed, my husband and I had a beach date.  Here I am with a cup of Dunkin Donuts, enjoying the 75 degree weather, cloudy skies and brisk breeze.  And of course, my growing, incredibly bushy hair.

I just thought this was funny.
All I want to do is take our Christmas tree down, put away all the ornaments and lights, and just start 2015.  The last couple of years have just been ROTTEN.  Between losing my babies, losing my job, all the financial issues, I just want a fresh clean start.  I'm ready to shine in 2015!  Praying my readers had a wonderful Christmas, and will have a bright and shiny upcoming year as well.  We all need it.

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