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Monday, October 12, 2009

The Importance of Being Pulled Together

Do you ever have a day when you decide, Awwww, SCREW IT. I'm not going anywhere today, so I'm going to schlep. I'm going to wear gray stretchy yoga pants from Old Navy, and my bright yellow Tommy Hilfiger shirt which is so stained that I only wear it when I go fishing or I'm cleaning, painting or dyeing my hair? I'm going to put my hair up in a bun, and put on zit cream, and wear my glasses while I drink coffee?

Yeah. Bad day to get called into the high school to pick up your sick daughter, isn't it?

Unfortunately, I had no clothes to wear. I'd worn everything this week. I seriously don't own a ton of clothing. I'm super duper picky over what I wear, which means I wear what I have a lot. And since I decided to go to a once a week laundry schedule, I'm down to the dregs come Monday (my laundry day is Monday.)

Anyhoodles, I had just settled into my yoga pants and comfy shirt. Cup 1 of Joe down the hatch. And then the phone rang.

"Mommy?" came the whimper. Of course. Missy. On my way. I look down. OH NOOOOOO. I look like twenty pounds of poo in a ten pound bag. Well, who's gonna see me? ONLY THE ENTIRE HIGH SCHOOL. On my way!!!

So I drive to school, park the car, and I'm on my way to the front door. "Young lady!" I hear a woman bark. I didn't even look up, I kept walking. Finally, a hand on my shoulder: "YOUNG LADY!" I was so surprised, I turned around, my mouth hanging open. I'm sure she got a shot of my coffee breath. "Where is your pass!" She snapped at me. I'm totally confused. Pass? I'm not even inside yet! I said, "I'm going to the office now." She said, "You know you're not allowed to walk around this campus without a pass!" It finally dawned on me what she meant..."Excuse me, ma'am. Do you think I'm a student? I'm here to pick up my daughter. She's in the clinic." This old lady didn't believe me until I pulled out my driver's license which showed the super sexy year of birth 1975 which I think proves that I'm not a high school student. I was finally allowed to go to the clinic, pick up my little girl who was born in 1995 and head home. But that was pretty funny. I don't generally think I can pass myself off as 18. Maybe 29 on a good day when I've done my hair and makeup. Anyway, that is a very good reason to make sure you are not a schlep when you go to high school....some old bat will insist you need a pass!

6 comments:

Terry @ Breathing Grace said...

On the up side, you DID get carded. At the ripe old age of 34?

My children would have preferred I pause and got dressed. Your daughter seems much more understanding.

Sarah R said...

Girl, everything I owned was in the washing machine. So either I need to do two laundry days a week, or buy new clothes. I think I know which one I'm leaning toward...

Michelle said...

Hahaha!! How great is that?!?! I was out with Maddie one time when Hope was a baby and some lady in the doctor's office asked if I was the GRANDMA!! Really, lady? Really? Consider yourself blessed!! haha!

Sarah R said...

Well, here's the thing. I don't think she thought I was a teenager because I looked particularly young. I think it's because I looked like a SLOB!

Kelly said...

Oh Sarah, that is totally hilarious!!

I hung out in my yoga pants and oversize long sleeved t today, but I did to my hair and make up. You never know when you may need to run out ;) Actually, I do my hair and makeup every day unless I am sick in bed. I eat better when I do. Weird, huh?

I hope your daughter is feeling better.

Jennifer M. said...

Lol - that's hilarious. I get mistaken for a highschooler every now and then myself (I'm 30). I'm never sure if I should be thankful or offended!