My Little One Has Gone To Heaven

Jeremiah 29:11

New International Version (NIV)

¹¹ For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

When things don't make sense in an sad world, I lean on His Word (actually I lean on His Word all the time, but these sad times probably even more).  I don't know why my baby died.  I may never know.  I don't know His plans for me.  But I do know that "life ain't fair" which I tell my kids all the time.  Today, life was not only unfair, but incredibly cruel to me.  Our little Fergus is with Our Lord in Heaven.  I will never get to hold, rock, cradle, or nurse my little one.  I don't understand it.  But I do have the Lord to lean on.  I have said many times on here how much I despise Father's Day, yet today I wanted to run on my Daddy's lap and have him wrap my arms around me and hold me.   Today I think I understood fully why he is called Father God.  I wanted my Daddy today.  My Father God.   And as busy as the universe is, He had time to listen to my cries. 

I found this sweet picture on Pinterest, and I thought, when I heal, I will be getting a tattoo of this.  Goodbye, Fergus.  I loved you with my whole heart, and the hardest thing for a Mama to do is to let her little ones go.  I am sad; so beyond sad.  My heart is broken into a million, trillion pieces.  But I will see you again someday in Paradise.  Be a good Fergus, and don't get into as much trouble as your siblings here on earth, ok?  I love you....Always, Mama.