Give Me A Heart Attack Why Don't You???

I've made it no secret that Mr. R and I would love to have more children.  In January 2012, Mr. R had his 13 year old vasectomy reversed, and it was a success, as he's got "ammunition" now, as he calls it.  We've tried for 9 months.  I try not to think about it; I don't want this to turn into a "I'm so depressed" blog, and so I've kept it mostly to myself.  My confidantes?  My husband, of course, and one of my besties, Ginger.  My sister is also aware, although she thinks we're nuts.

My last cycle started on Aug 22, and Mr. R was home for all the appropriate times, and so we got to business.  I had that week of nausea, then I got sick.  I'm sure the sickness was dragged on, because I wouldn't take anything for it...just in case, you know?  So on Friday, when I tested and it was negative, all I could do was shrug and go about my business.  I tested again Sunday.  Negative.  Fine.  I can live, I can deal.  Went to church, worked with the kids in ministry, took Sunday pictures.  I came home, watched HGTV in bed and truly kicked back.

Sunday night, I was attempting to get undressed.  I reached back to unhook my bra (and I mean, I have been wearing a bra for 25 years now...not old hat here!) and the metal hook when right under my fingernail and spurted blood.  OWWWWWWW.  I sat down on the potty, tears in my eyes, trying to shake off the pain.  Wow, fingernails are sensitive!  I don't know why I looked into the garbage can.  But my eyes fell on the test I took this morning.  And it was very slightly, very faintly, hardly noticeable...positive.

NO WAY.

It was not positive that morning, I can tell you.  The test says to wait 2 minutes to read, and not to read after 10 minutes.  I was reading the test more than 15 hours later.  And I am out of tests!  I called Mr. R excitedly.  He of course, reacted like a man.  "So go buy more tests."  "Honey, it's after 11pm and I am in my pajamas!"  "Get a test tomorrow."  "I can't!  Missy has the car!"  "Get a test when she's home from school."  Ok, phew, I can do that.   I waited until this morning to call Ginger.  After we squealed on the phone in a pitch that only dogs in my neighborhood could hear, I promised her I would pick up a few tests today and test again tomorrow.  Today or tomorrow is actually the day I'm expecting my period.  It makes sense to wait until Wednesday because that is when I'd be officially late.  But my heart can't take this...I have to know!!!