Why Don't You Make Like a Tree and Leave?

Can you see my poor neighbor Kim in the background, surveying the damage?

This tree is ENORMOUS.

I can get out, but everyone else on our street has to backtrack!

We had a thunderstorm come through about 5pm this afternoon.  I am very glad I was at home, and not on the interstate.  No one is hurt, and we still have power, too!

Women and Careers

Hot topic or no?  Most women I know are in the workplace, somehow.  Either they work part time, full time, or telecommute (like me.)  If they're not in the work force, they're in training/college to enter it.  Very few women I know, even in the church that I attend, are stay at home wives/mothers.  Or, they earn extra money by babysitting or having a home daycare, or sales of some sort; either Mary Kay, Avon, Pampered Chef.  I've been in the workforce myself, off and on, since I was about 16 years old.  My first job was as a cashier at Hardees in Winter Park, Florida, on the corner of 17-92 and Lee Road.  It's not there anymore.  I think it's a steakhouse now? 
My dream job, to be perfectly honest, with you, is to not "work" at all.  I wish I could be a stay at home mother, cleaning, cooking, sewing, and growing a garden.  Some way, some how, that ended up not happening.  Now, I'm on the precipice of graduating from college in less than a month, with fresh student loans ahead of me. 
Am I glad I'm about to graduate?  Yes, of course.  I started college way back in 1993 as an immature 18 year old girl.  It took me and additional 18 years just to get my associates degree.  Being a wife and mother dominates my life just as much now as it did back then. 
So why did I go back to school, when it actually goes against what I wanted for my future?

1)  To say I finished.  Silly?  Maybe.  Probably! 
2)  As insurance.  I am the one who carries the medical insurance on this family.  I have high blood pressure and diabetes.  If I lost my job, I'd be uninsurable.
3)  As insurance, part 2.  I'm the product of a failed relationship.  So is my husband.  I love him dearly, and I know he'd never leave me.  BUT...it is always in the back of my mind that if SOMETHING were to ever happen, either divorce or death, that I still have three children who need money.  Many people would say, "Well, there is always child support."  Neither my father or my sister's father paid any.  Neither did my husband's father.  That's why we grew up in abject poverty.  We both know what it's like to go without basic things like warm coats in the winter, shoes that fit, and dinner. 
4)  Knowing that the field I chose has a good chance of me working from home.  There's a reason I didn't choose nursing school.  Even though that is also a 2 year program, and pays far better than a coder, I have no desire to work nights, weekends and holidays.  I'm also not scared of blood, poo, urine or vomit...also spit/sputum skeeves me out.  So nursing could have been a good choice for me, but I chose something a bit more predictable.
5) A good chance of entrepreneurship.  Many coders have their own side businesses doing billing for offices who don't want to pay for an onsite biller.  Once I get a year or two of coding under my belt, I may consider that. 

My daughter is almost 16, and is a sophomore in high school.  She is getting college material in the mail.  She doesn't seem to be interested in looking at it yet.  I'm almost relieved.  I worry about her getting into debt and falling into a career before she's really ready to make a solid decision.  I was a pyschology major back in 1993, and I'm not at all interested in that now.  But those student loans persist, don't they? 
So what say you?   I believe that once women have children, they should be at home with their children.  I don't feel that way about women who are married without children, or women who have grown children.  But life sure is messy, and it can get in the way of our good intentions.  I never thought I'd end up with a child with autism, and that it would be my job that got him the insurance needed for his therapy.  I never thought my husband would become a truck driver halfway through our marriage, and leave for weeks at a time.  I never imagined that I could be responsible for an entire household myself, and possibly support Mr. R's mom too (more news on THAT later.)  How do you plan for the unexpected? 

Failure to plan, is planning to fail!

It makes me glad, that during these stressful times, that I *do* have a career that I can depend on, which feeds my family, pays my mortgage, puts gas in my car, and even allows fun stuff like a trip to the movies and getting my hair done.
Please, what say you?

How to Freak Sarah Out

My husband was home for an entire week.  It was lovely.  One night after the kids were in bed, we were lying in bed together.  He was flipping through news channels.  I had my head on his chest and he was playing with my hair (even before I got it all fixed.  What an awesome hubby.)  He murmured sleepily, "Wouldn't it be awesome if we had twins someday?"  And I thought, Uhhhh, NO.  I'd love to have another baby...even two more babies!  But not two at once.  This lady requires sleep and I have student loans to pay off.  I giggled and told him to knock it off.
Today, on facebook, my Aunt Linda sent me an instant message.  I hadn't talked to her in years.  Not because I'm angry or she's angry.  But she's rarely online and we don't have a phone conversation.  I've actually never met this aunt except for when I was an infant, due to my sperm donor bio dad leaving my mom high and dry.  Anyway, I have a cordial email relationship with the Millers in my life, and I'm pretty ok with that.  However, what she said made my stomach drop into my colon:
"Sarah!  I dreamt that you had twins and I begged you to let me remain your aunt so I can visit you!"

Yeah, ok.  A bit freaked out now.  lol

Want To See?

I posted this horrifying pic only to show how bad the gray is now. 

Much better!

It was 91 degrees today...notice my face is flushed and I look kind of sweaty.

Highlights are BLONDE, not GRAY!

Love, love, love, HAPPY!

Oh yes.  I'm actually giddy.

Seriously, this is the best hair in forever.  I don't have a ponytail anymore, but it's manageable and shiny and oh so gorgeous!

On my way to church.  Wearing a shirt that made me sweat so bad, that I wondered if I was hitting menopause today.

But gosh.  I look cute.

Yes.  It's that bright outside.

Ugh.  91 in March.  Blargh!!!

Expectations

Look.  I super fluffy heart love you guys.  But between work and parenting and school and studying for my CCA, I don't expect to be on too much for the next few weeks.  I only have so much free time, and unfortunately, it's my blog that is going to suffer.
So hang tight, wish me luck, pray for me, and be ready for a few pictures...I'm going to get my hair professionally "done" this Saturday!  No more gray...yaaaaay!

501st Post, Plus Some Career News!

I didn't realize my quick apology post was my 500th.  What a bummer.  I should have done something cool for that.
Well, I am happy to report that I am scheduled to take my CCA national coding exam on April 9th.  I'm very excited and definitely scared.  It's not a cheap test and so I really don't want to fail it.  I even requested April 7th and 8th off work, so I can study for two days while the kids are in school.
I have nothing else interesting to share.  But don't worry!  Tomorrow, Mr. R will be home.  We are planning to go to The Winghouse in Daytona Beach for dinner, and then spend the evening at the beach.  I'll definitely take some pictures so hopefully by this weekend, you guys can be jealous of our 80 degree weather in March.  (I'll be jealous of the rest of you come August when I'm miserable with the 102 heat with 98% humidity, I assure you.)

Apology

Laptop has been down for nearly a week.  It's barely up and moving.  I'm actually  impressed that I could log in.  Hopefully this will be fixed soon and I'll be back to regular posting.  Until then...6 weeks til I graduate!

Oh, So NOW You Like Me? HMPH!!!

Yesterday was the last day of my internship.  I said teary goodbyes to the new ladies I had met, and I bought doughnuts for the crew as well.  (Next time I'm bringing a quiche or something, hardly anyone ate them.)  At lunch, the manager asked me to come into her office.  It was only the second time I had met her.  She apparently doesn't spend much time in the office, which I prefer.  I don't like to be micromanaged and generally prefer to work at my own pace and get the job done.  Anyway, I thanked her again for her hospitality in allowing me to intern, told her I learned a lot and regretted having to leave.

All good things to say, I guess, because they asked me to stay.  :D

Now, I'm not there now.  There is about to be an open position because the lady who trained me is leaving this Friday.  The manager asked me if I would be interested in her position, and I of course said "Yes!"  She told me that if I followed proper protocol and applied for the position, it was mine if I wanted it.  So now I'm just waiting for it to pop up in the intranet at work so I can attach my resume and get called in for an official interview.

The bad parts:  OY VEY THE DRIVE TO ORLANDO IS GOING TO COST ME A FORTUNE!!!  It is such a long commute.  I spent between 2-3 hours a day in my car last week and I did not enjoy it all that much.  However, the office is relocating to a closer spot (I'm telling you the building I was in was filled with asbestos or something.  I was sick the entire 6 days I was there!) which would cut the commute by about 20 minutes.   Then, in about another year, the coders will all be at home.  So it would be about a year of commuting and I'll be back at home coding.  I'm thinking it's a good amount of time to invest.  Unfortunately, next school year is the year that Bucket will be at the house by himself in the mornings.  I'm not so sure about leaving him alone.  And you know there is no daycare for 8th graders!  Not that I'd put him in one; he'd be furious.  I'm not sure what to do about this situation at all.  You see, I can stay home until he leaves for school at 8am.  But that means I won't make it into Orlando until 9:15 to 9:30, which means I have to stay at work until after 6pm, which means I won't be home until after 7pm every day, and that is NOT COOL AT ALL  MY FRIENDS.  What to do, what to do?  At least in summer I can leave early, the kids will be sleeping and I don't need babysitters during the summer at all.

The good parts:  The money.  I still haven't talked to anyone about pay.  Oh, let me correct that.  I did my best to find out, but I think all my coworkers must be secret agents at their second jobs because I got no info whatsoever.  But I know it's more.  Just not sure how much.  Will it cover my fuel costs?  Oh, and the work.  I don't know how this happens, but the pay is better and the work is easier.  I loved it.  I am not always about an easy way out, but there is so much less drama in coding than where I am now.  No screaming patients in a lobby.  No frantic emails at 5am.  No constant phone calls.  At least in the area where I was, pathology, it's really just you, your computer, the occasional phone call, and unlimited coffee.  (Ok, I made that last part up.  Hahahaha)  I absolutely thrive on just WORKING, just give me my computer and a comfy chair and I will code my little heart out!  Plus, it was nice to just get out of the house.  I did enjoy being social and talking to actual people IN PERSON and getting dressed up.  I also enjoy being in Orlando.  I think Orlando can be a cute little city and to prove it, here are a few shots from the top of the parking garage:

Well, it's not NYC, but it'll do.  And yes, it was a beautiful day on Monday when I took these.  About 85 and sunny!

So, this is the outfit I wore when I was "offered" the coding position.  Honestly, I thought I looked great, but not liking these shots at all.  I'm offering the butt shot for a reason: this is why I don't wear pants.  I have a serious tukkus and skirts hide the voluptuousness of it.  Because seriously, I should only wear these for my husband.  I had no idea how...round...I was from the back and now I'm thinking, holy crap, I wore these ALL DAY in front of PEOPLE and they SAW MY BUTT.  ~faints~

I'm thinking I might still be able to pull off this top with a black a-line skirt. 

It has ruching on the side which I think is really cute.  I do not like the sleeves at all.  Either sleeveless or to the elbow, please!  I don't understand the popularity of cap sleeves at all.  Unless you have thin muscular arms, it looks good on no one!

And this is why I don't wear pants!

Oh, and just for kicks.  Hercules the cat sleeping inside of of Mr. R's speakers.

Oh, well let me get to the reason why I named my blog post what I did.
Today was my first day back.  I expected hell and it was delivered promptly.  I did my best to remain cheerful and got my work done.  None of my managers even welcomed me back.  In fact, only one finally emailed me, and it was close to 4pm at that point, and only because I emailed her several times with a problem account for the next day.  Fine, whatever.  However, I did receive an email about how "I'm a wonderful asset to the team, I know you can get this schedule under control."  Darned if I did not roll my eyes so hard that I gave myself a headache.  I've been on this team for ten years.  Ten years!  Only now that I'm within a few weeks of graduating from college and getting my national certification do I get kudos and emails about how special I am?  Why do I have the feeling that the only thing they're worried about is training my replacement?  I have been given the bare minimum in raises for the past ten years.  The hospital does a cost of living wage increase every year which I do appreciate and I know I am blessed to have a work at home job in such an awful economy.  Yes, I know these things!  But to know that you worked your tail off, worked off the clock to help patients, worked through your kids birthdays, your anniversary, Christmas Eve, recitals, birthday parties, car accidents, field trips...to get the bare minimum raise that even the slackers get?  It hurts.  And makes you wonder why you bother, but a person like me can't help to do their very best.  It is ingrained in me to do my best at all times!  So I sucked it up and prayed for a better raise next year.  And didn't get it.  And so on, and so on. 

I'll be grateful forever to my department for taking a chance on a 25 year old mom of three with no experience except for waitressing and telemarketing.  I've learned to be a good employee, to work super hard and take my job seriously.  But I think after ten years, I'm ready to move on, and hopefully not be remembered as the flighty 25 year old girl, but as a mid 30s professional career woman.  Yes, even at home!